Looking more closely at the cases and the circumstances of the people I meet daily (we have to document everything in detail now), there’s lots of added burdens and little relief, or so it seems! Until the good shepherd picks up the trembling little lamb on His shoulders and carries it back to green pastures… Praise Him, who lifts the burdens off the weary, embraces us in His tender and loving mercies…
Lately, as I’ve been burdened by some really hard cases, been physically sick and discouraged, My dear sisters in Christ have encouraged me in so many wonderful ways!!! The Lord’s been just awesome! Giving some folks I don’t even know the very same groanings of the Spirit I’ve experienced. At times, words of knowledge from total strangers, and special encouragement from dear precious friends, when it’s needed the most…
Come all ye who are weary, come all ye who are heavy laden, and I will give you rest… Thank You Lord Jesus!
On Sunday, I went to this church (being totally out of it, desperate, burdened and hungry for any touch from God) and the pastor’s wife came over to greet me. I mentioned that I came because I needed prayer (was ready to spill my guts, so to speak). She said, great, we’re doing this revival/healing thing today (they were watching it on the screen and worshiping along). Everybody was busy praising and singing and stuff, and I just started to spill out my guts to the Lord, silently or quietly naming the people/ cases I had been interceding for (I’m not a loud mouth for
sure). Then I noticed what sounded like someone praying in tongues behind me (I later realized it was her, and her husband, the pastor was sitting next to her). Something beautiful happened! As I was pouring out my pleadings to God, she started weeping, even crying out loud (this went on for quite a while) and I felt how my burdens were being lifted off and totally removed, replaced by a peaceful, sweet assurance that the Lord “got it covered”.
Wow… Is God awesome or what? I wondered if this dear sister was sharing the groanings I was (or had been) experiencing in my spirit. Her husband did look at me kind of funny as I had to leave all of a sudden, to pick up my son James (who pretty much owns the local skate park these days)… Anna was with me at church also, enjoying it very much (last night she goes, “mom, can we go back to that church tonight?”).
I had a special dream a few weeks ago, thought I should post it here also. I was very burdened at the time.
Exhausted from praying into the early am hours, I cried out to Lord,”How can I bear these burdens Lord, You see how my heart breaks every day!”
I fell asleep and found myself dreaming. I was laying on a dusty floor, under a heavy wooden table, surrounded by pairs of dirty feet, some with sandals on, but not all, I think… I crawled over to a specific pair of very dusty feet and started kissing them, my tears flowing down, falling on His feet, mixing in with dust as I kept weeping and kissing… Spending time at my Master’s feet!
I had another interesting experience 9 days ago. I planned on “going out to the boonies” after the church service, just to be alone with Lord. So I brought my jeans, running shoes and 3 bottles of water (good thinking!), and a rain poncho in my van, asking my husband to drive the kids home from church so I could get away… Drove about 25 mi. out of town to a natural area in the middle of nowhere (about 3,300 acres of the natural Florida with miles and miles of horse tracks and hiking trails). There were a few groups on horseback that passed me before I reached the hiking trails. I had a map so I wouldn’t get lost.
In these areas the indian tribe of Ai’s resided 3-4 centuries ago until they died of extinction, by diseases brought over by the early pioneers. (I posted the vision of my encounter with an Ai, when I worked at the runaway shelter about a year ago on this blog). After about two thirds of the way into my hike, the trail was impossible to pass through because of the overgrowth. I realized that the hiking trails had not been serviced or cleared, like the nice wide horse trails. No service roads crossed the blue trail I was on, either. I decided that surely I’ll find the path again if I cut through the easiest passages I find through the brush. So I continued, spotting one blue spot maybe a quarter mile further, then another one, which encouraged me to keep going. After all, I’m a Finn, and Finns don’t get lost in the woods! Stubborn or stupid, take your pick! Because for sure, I lost my way! I wondered in this wilderness for hours, realizing that the fallen trees and growth had been there for 3 years, since the hurricanes hit the area!
There I was, scrambling and climbing over fallen trees, tripping over vines covered by sharp thorns. I was wearing short jeans because it was
hot… At one point I noticed on my legs, blood dripping from my knees to the ankles with scratches several inches long. I wiped off the blood with my own spit and pulled up my dark socks, which didn’t help much, but at least covered the scrapes and kept the bleeding to the minimum…
What made matters worse, I had to change my direction over and over, because I couldn’t make it through the brush one way or another. I remembered the sun’s location during the first half of my hike (the trail’s shape was that of a loop) so most times I was able to turn back toward the right direction, after cutting paths through the briers, bristles, trees, sawgrass, you name it… The natural Florida. Had I not brought all that water, who knows if I had made it back. Or had I met a rattler or a wild hog, who knows… “Lord, this is not what I came here for!!!” I complained, comparing the pricks of thorns, wonderings in the wilderness with bible stories. “Do You intend this to be a lesson, Lord? Come on, I’ve had enough wilderness experience lately, do You have to be so literal about it???!!!” And, hearing a distant rumble of a thunderstorm: “Why on earth did I leave my rain coat in the van?”
Well, He saw me through it. Finally, at my most desperate point, I came to a clearing (in one moment, I’m thinking, can I make it through this wall of thistles and dead branches, and decided to break through if it takes my life!!!) So I crash through this thing, and the next thing I see, a perfect clearing, I landed right by a horse trail! Thank you Jesus! Especially for the fact that there were zero onlookers! Whew, what an experience… I figured out my approximate location on the map and marched the last mail or two as the great thick clouds continued building up, the rumbling of thunder getting closer and closer. It was an awesome sight to behold, God’s majesty!!! Made it back to my van just in time, before the rain drops turned to a downpour… Drove back exhausted, arriving home just as the heavens opened in a rainstorm that turned into a monsoon.
Life’s an adventure!