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Archive for January, 2007

Week Three

Week Three

Hey, what happened to Jesus? Where’d He go? It appears that I haven’t been walking closely with Christ during these past weeks. Instead I’ve let go of His hand and chosen my own pathways. Gone astray, to wander about in the abyss where the light is waning and the darkness is eagerly waiting to embrace a lost soul. Find me again Lord Jesus, will you?!?

Psalms 69:2,14 I sink in deep mire, Where there is no standing; I have come into deep waters, Where the floods overflow me. Deliver me out of the mire, And let me not sink; Let me be delivered from those who hate me, And out of the deep waters.

Sure all this supernatural stuff is exciting and alluring, but I ought to be grounded in Christ Jesus and my mind, soul and spirit should be centered in Him. So the fight goes on
still… Always?

I had a difficult week. Nothing worked out as planned. I had zero control over the situations at work or at home this week and got frustrated and furious, even hateful. Guilt followed close behind, as usual. Then the self-loathing, self-pity. Oh well, that’s how it goes sometimes… Mercy, Lord!

So many others around me are hurting too. Struggling. Breaking apart, it seems. To endure through the trials, to be willing to accept Your chastening, Lord, will it yield fruit in our lives? Please sustain us through this grinding process. Bring us closer to you, and  closer to one another, so that we may also help lift and carry each other’s burdens.

Prayers needed. Lots and lots of…

Week Two

Week two

What an exciting week!
I made a very special discovery this week!

First of all, I confessed my latest "baddie" at our weekly bible study. I had to… Daddy always has a way of convicting you through His Spirit. As usual, the discussion turned into a direct message that sank straight into my heart. Once again we discussed the subject of being open and honest with each other in the body of believers. Last fall I was convicted about the necessity and importance of this issue but did not open up due to a fear of not being understood.

We had a very small group gather this Wednesday so I found the courage to open up, Thank you Jesus! Felt much better for doing it, although my friends probably brushed it off simply as a scam and a waste of money. That’s just as well- the main thing is that I got it off my chest!

Sunday night at the Upper Room was special. We all had needs and prayer requests and God was on the move!!! All right Daddy, you’re awesome! We bring all praise and glory to Your Holy name!!! Brother J needed healing for his arm (he fell earlier during the week) due to which we had brother M. visit and play guitar at the worship, God bless him! sister S. needed emotional healing, as she’s been going through a lot at work. She’s an advocate for HIV patients and often acts in a very direct and courageous manner (I bet the angels in heaven cheer as they observe this child of God speak!). Anyway, she’s been persecuted as a result of speaking from the heart as a Christian ought to.

Brother L. has been suffering from a bad back and got instant results from God "popping" things right back into place! Praise God, brother J also gave a good report about the bones in his wrist being healed! Our God is a God of miracles indeed!

I renounced my interest and dabbling with the works of darkness out loud and received prayer and healing also, as we were being anointed with oil and prayed upon. Brother L. felt a special anointing coming from the Lord and asked who was in the need of it. I knew that was for me, and he laid hands on me and I received! Wow, that night was very powerful and interesting indeed!

Back at work that night, I received a special answer regarding "dem buggers" I continually experience at the shelter. I have been puzzled over the whole phenomena that takes place in the back office. The fact that these spirit entities come popping through even when I’m studying bible or in a deep devotion and praise mode, often surprises me and I don’t know what to make of it. Even at times of serious face-down, prostrate repenting in the presence of God I hear and sense (kind of see) them present. I’ve found it very odd that they can "stand" in the presence of Holy Spirit.

That night, after our special gathering, I observed and questioned this very thing again as I had a little time available for R&R in the back office. I did my typical full-body relaxation (which sometimes prompts me to leave my body, as I lose all physical feeling and restraints) but instead of OBE, I brought on a serious petition to find a clear answer to my question.

Immediately, I was moved in the spirit to a very low place, at the feet of someone. The first thing I saw was two bare feet and a bottom of a staff striking the ground. They were strong, continous, rhythmic strikes and I felt a sensation of shaking in the ground. I was very close to it and began to rise in the spirit while observing carefully what I was seeing. The person was wearing a brown (loin cloth?) that reached down to his knees, made of an animal skin. As I continued rising I observed red and black paint on his chest that reminded me of a red flower surrounded by outward black lines and highlights.

By now I was coming face-to-face with this person or a spirit. He was (obviously) an indian, about 30 years old. His cheeks and the ridge of his nose were painted red and black as well. Our eyes met and he stared at me with a very stern look in his eyes for the longest time. Was there animosity in that stare, I’m not sure. I suppose I stared back, as I was carefully observing him. He kept striking the ground with his staff (in a way that could be conceived as either threatening or attention demanding). As I saw the whole picture, I suddenly came out of the vision, jumped to my feet, and excitedly stated "THANK YOU", as I rushed back to the tower to draw a rough sketch of what I had seen. I also told B. about the vision I had and showed her the sketches later during that shift.

The following day, I went on-line to research the area’s history. I was aware of the Seminole Indian wars that took place in the 1800’s, when "Fort" Pierce was established, named after Gen. Pierce. I knew the indian in my vision could not possibly be a Seminole, whose appearance and dress style is very different from what I saw.

What I found out excited me to the core! In our area there existed an indian tribe called Ai’s (pronounced eye-ee-ahs). They were eradicated by the mid 1740’s by diseases brought by white men. They had strong mistrust of Europeans, especially the English. Who could blame them for that? Jonathan Dickinson had encountered many indians and stayed with this perticular tribe.

He described his contact in a diary of 1696 as follows: "The pole was set up in the earth. Six men painted red and black, with rattles and bows and arrows, danced around it."
2 October:

Arrived at the Jece (Ais) Village near Vero Beach. Met
with another shipwreck crew of five men and one woman. Their ship the
Nantwitch also got caught in the same storm as the Dickinsons.

Furthermore, I read about the striking staff or spear which was used for fishing. I saw a picture of a pendant (artifact connected to the tribe) which was the same shape as the figure painted(?) on the indian’s chest in my vision.

I finally understood! That is why the spirits kept coming, even during devotional times. After all, they worshiped God as well (the Great Spirit) and were either curious or drawn to be present as I drew near to God. No more confusion, thank you Lord! This may be difficult for some to swallow because of the limited knowledge, but it makes perfect sense to me! Considering the way the indian in my vision was striking the earth beneath his feet may indicate that our shelter may be situated directly over Ai’s sacred burial site, and that is why they keep re-appearing.

Now they also have a contact with a "sensitive" living person, which in part may draw more activity.

A couple of sensitive kids have seen things and told me and/or other staff. Months ago one young man saw a masked person (perhaps an indian w/painted face) and just the other day a young Haitian boy (who says that "his dad is devil") saw someone quickly running past him. He was all shaken up and came to us, saying: "That ain’t right, that ain’t right!" He described what he saw and I told him that some call them "shadow people" and I see them as well. Not to worry, they won’t harm anyone. I need to pray on behalf of E. and possible family/ancestor voodoo connections.

I hope this isn’t too much to swallow for those Christian friends that read my journal. But I’m beginning to accept the fact that God allows me to have this special knowledge or "gift" and does not judge me on the basis that I cannot help it or stop it from happening, Though I’ve fought it long and hard.

Here’s links to websites with additional info on Ai’s:

Also, I’ll post my drawings in the weird stuff album when I have the time. Now I gotta run…

Week One

Week One

To begin the New Year on the right foot, I made a vow to consecrate my self and my life fully to the Lord. So, as you already may guess, I both renewed and broke my promises to God within the first seven days… Mercy!

The first five days went swell, our weekly bible study blessed us (as it always does) with special encouragement and insight.  Friday night my dear husband and I headed toward St. Augustine, the nation’s oldest city.  It was to be a combined anniversary and birthday treat.

We had a great time strolling down the old city streets, absorbing it’s history and charm. There’s always a lot of things to do and see, no matter how often you visit. After seeing some historical sights, we visited the craft villages. I found a beautiful hand embroidered ovat tablecloth for our dining set, a complete set with 8 napkins. (See pictures)  What a royal treat.

Along with it’s rich history and tourist attractions, St Augustine also draws visitors who are interested in exploring the supernatural.  I love cemeteries, the older the better!  We visited a beautiful Lady of la Leche shrine with it’s serene gardens, gravesites and archaelogical areas and meditated at the large cross. (See pictures)

We made a very special acquintance, had a long discussion with a catholic lady who was handing out prayer tracts.  Further down the same road, we stopped inside a little bed and breakfast inn, that advertised aura photography (See album titled weird stuff).  Could not resist the temptation – my husbands aura showed two colors, mine looked more like a rainbow, in comparison.  The "aura" specialist  commented my aura as "overwhelming" to her. She said that there’s so much going on… Then she scolded me for suppressing my natural Godgiven gifts that most people would give anything to possess.  Right…  We discussed interesting experiences and ideas, such that I know I should not dwell on. Especially since her family (Swedish origin) has for the past four generations been followers of spiritual movement of Swedenborgianism.

Well, that was my "baddie" as B. would say…

Happy New Year

Weeks 15-18
Time to wrap it up!
This will be a quick overview of 2006 holiday
season, or it may end up covering the whole year… So much has
happened to me and my family (not only the immediate one, I’m also
including my church family, dear brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus).

the holidays, Lord came to receive one of us (our precious sister T.)
to enter His kingdom. What a beautiful bride she must’ve been! Dear
Lord, comfort and sustain brother S. who lost his beloved wife! She
will be missed until the day we’re all reunited in God’s kingdom.

the year came to an end, my dear friend B. lost her beloved grandmother
in Connecticut. Her sister M. and mother were there to bid farewell to
their dear grandma and mother. Lord, comfort their grieving hearts –
they lost a dear family member, may You draw them closer to you now

B. and I have been busy, working right through the
holidays. Better pay, but as a mother I felt robbed, being "out of it"
following the night shifts. I need to devote more time for my family.

had some serious abuse cases at work, lots of prayers going to the
throne of God. Remember these teens Lord, because we often lose touch
with them as they come and go. Lord, Please remember them (though we
may forget), keep them in your loving care, heal their hurts, restore
their families (if they have one) and provide them with opportunities!

Upper Room, our gatherings have been small in numbers but powerful in
receiving God’s Holy Spirit and guidance through worship, praise and
studying of His word. We have so much to be grateful for, and we trust
that You continue with us Lord, moving and working through us to gather
Your children unto You. We will not be discouraged, because we depend
on You and trust that everything will go according to Your purpose and
timing Lord!

Brother L. and sister S. are in the process of
moving back closer to the church- what good news! These dear friends
will be in my prayers, I hope I can help and support them in other ways
as well. Lord give them strength, patience and endurance- restore
brother L. back in good health… Also, my dear husband is still
suffering with his stomach condition, may he receive healing this year,

Help our oldest son with his school work, he is under
tremendous pressure trying to "catch up" in the IB program. Our 14-yr.
old got into a bit of trouble, we’re meeting with JPO Jan.17 to
discuss this situation. Holy Spirit, I trust that You will be present
and directing our words during the meeting.

Lord, into your hands I commit all my loved ones!
How I love you Lord!!!

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